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Lover's Handicap
2011, April, 14 Øyvind Henriksen

Lover's Handicap

Affairs, Relationships, Courtships, call them whatever you want, sooner or later we all experience the varied trysts of LOVE. Rarely does it happen that our first lover stays our last lover. Love is an Event and Loving the Journey.

As Oxford calls it, “a strong feeling of affection", Love, hits everyone.  Boy meets Girl, Attraction, Phone Numbers, Dates, Relationship, Kiss, Anniversary, Arguments, Break up, Patch up, Break up, Depression… Next; (Sequence of events not defined)

Or something like that. At least the stereotype chain reaction looks like that for the majority. It’s a graph of ups and downs with elements like Excitement, Happiness and hiccups of Boredom. At times you feel like you finally know what love is all about until you meet the next one. Then again what is Love?

  • Someone you want to be with when you are alone?
  • Someone you want to come home to?
  • Someone who makes you happy?
  • Someone who turns your wrong into right?


Well that seems like being more dependent THAN being more in love. That is definitely not love. It’s called being Handicapped! Of course you should have those feelings too, but that is just the addition to love, and not the reason for loving.

Unfortunately, as I believe it is out there in the real world: that there are too many couples that have fallen into the habit of just having one another. Some might want to argue that this is the inevitable end of the road where you "grow into" the relationship on another level, or the "next level", where the chemical reactions of being in love has met its equilibrium. I Do believe in Ups and Downs in a relationship, but I also believe that You can find that Perfect Match that will always be something more than just a safe harbor that you know and don’t dare to leave.

In My World, the chemical proses will not stop when there is a perfect love reaction with the perfect match involved. Although some additional heating from time to time will of course not only help to keep the reaction going much easier, but also make the reaction to go much stronger.

So do we Find Love or Does Love Happen? It’s actually a mix of both the ingredients. Its only when we ask that we truly receive.

Does the phrase "Opposites Attract" ring a bell or two? Well I've heard that for years, but when it came to the test, it only drove me away from the person. I believe it takes a commonness to strike a chord of a kind with that someone special before taking the next step. Like having a Friend in your Lover first.

And to top it all: what if you and your partner had similar passions? Wouldn’t it just be ideal to have a best friend in your partner who shares to a significant extent the same passions as you? Now that’s something to think about.

"You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly."
-Sam Keen

 

To Love and etc.!

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Lover's Handicap
Øyvind Henriksen

Øyvind Henriksen

I am not a blogger! I just put my thoughts into writing some times...
Feel free to give me a comment and let me know what you think.

Øyvind Henriksen